Okay, this isn't food, but again with the procrastination.
I was reading a few reviews on google to check out a place I'm going soon, and I stumbled across this one guy on Yelp. He's local, had his full name on there, and wow... just... wow. I hope I never receive the scrutiny he applies to the patrons and servers in the restaurants he reviews. He doesn't even talk about the food! This guy is straight up cray cray. After 11 paragraphs about Big Whiskey's, covering everything from annoying diners to hot servers, he ended his review with a toast. Let me share.
To all of those who Yelp
May your reviews be true with depth.
No personal feelings of anger
Towards those who follow your departure.
Let us all gather
And show our favor
To the place of our choice
Lets here the sounds of this voice.
Cheers to the beer.
To all that are near.
Bottoms up to who-eva.
Where is my hot server Cara?
Who does that? What is he, a fucking bard? Seriously, check out his yelp page. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll never want to go out in public again.
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